Fed up. A week to go....

I want my body back.
I want my boobs back.
I want to be able to put my own knickers on without falling over.
I want the metallic taste in my mouth to disappear.
Most of all I want to meet my son.

I don't know what I hate more the feeling my ribcage is being pulled apart
or the fact its much harder to breathe.

Seven days have never felt so much like an eternity before...

'Pregnancy sexuality pictures'

I know I shouldnt, but this made me laugh...

"from pregnancy pregnant photos and wallpapers by Nasreddin

"Most people who try out the many possible positions during sex, are motivated by the search for new and exciting sensations. Aside from its novelty value but can help a number of less common positions, also in solving various physical and psychological problems. If you are pregnant or overweight, back pain or a short penis or your partner is greater or smaller than you, turns out to be potentially in a position that you have not tried or had pulled even considered as the best. Choosing the right position can a woman who previously had no orgasm help orgasm, an impotent man allow the execution of sexual intercourse and even make a seemingly infertile couple conceive possible."

Some more...

Positions in pregnancy:

At the beginning of pregnancy, a couple have intercourse as usual, unless the doctor forbids it in the first three months of pregnancy because of a previous miscarriage. If the pregnancy progresses and the abdomen of the woman is thicker, the conventional sex is uncomfortable or impossible. The woman is instructed on methods for which no direct pressure on the belly and she can control at least the depth of penetration. Both partners kneel on the bed, he enters from behind and avoid strong shocks Beck.



It is supported with spread legs, torso and legs. Because here is no pressure on the abdomen, this position for the late stage of pregnancy is appropriate.

This picture makes me laugh, as well as making me feel rather cautious. Y'ouch.

The couple is on the side, he enters from behind. Again, no printing is done on the abdomen.



The couple embraced on a chair. She sits on his lap and can control the depth of penetration.

10 positives about my pregnancy

Enough with the maternity moans! Below is a list of reasons to why I should like my pregnancy, rather than wishing for its inevitable end. This pregnancy has been rather tough, to be honest I hated the first and third trimester so much, those reasons alone would make me think twice about doing it again.
But heres a bunch of reasons that in a few weeks time, I may come to miss it.

1 - I get to interior design shop, a lot. No questions asked! ...Junk shops, Ikea, Habitat, no one can hold me back!

2 - It makes me think of the 'larger picture', rather than just my own needs. Helps me to put my existence in perspective

3 - Rowdy men on the street leave you alone, no wolf whistles or strange comments, sometimes they will be surprisingly respectful to you, holding doors open, etc.

4 - Because I have had severe nausea throughout this pregnancy my partner cooks every night, he has now become really good at cooking whereas before I couldn't trust him with a microwave.

5 - I did not suffer from stretchmarks nor did I get a Linea Alba, which I don't really like the look of. (some women do, I don't)

6 - Always having an unquestionable reason to get out of social arrangements if needed.

7 - Random chats with nostalgic middle age women about pregnancy in the supermarket.

8 - I have spent a lot of time reconnecting with my own Mother.

9 - My relationship has got much better, we communicate more efficiently, hardly argue and take things on the chin a lot more, again pregnancy has a way of making light of things which may have really knocked you down before.

10 - Sex is more intense when pregnant! It feels incredible!

[Picture left Die Hoffnung by Gustav Klimt (1903)]

Maternity clothing mayhem (belated post)

The majority of maternity clothing is far from exciting, my friend recently described the high street choices as 'dull casual office wear'. There seems to be a gap in the maternity clothing market, it is either elaborate party wear or plain functional work wear, in most cases they are usually both extremely overpriced.
Besides being absurdly expensive I find maternity clothing sizes to be quite unpredictable. I purchased a body con skirt, size 8/10 from Moda Mothercare and even in my 6 month bump it was 3 times too big. I am over 8 months now and it is still just too big... 'body-con' my bum!

Below are a few pointers that may help both women on a budget or women just wanting something with a bit more flair.

1- First port of call, and most obvious place would be eBay, type in 'maternity lot', or 'maternity bundle'. I grabbed some ace bargains that way! I managed to get a bag of 20 pieces most of which were all in season, it came to about £4! The were based far away and refused to post so I asked my Mother to pick up the bag for me as she lived near by to the seller. Most of the items are lush and I still haven't had chance to wear all of them as of yet!
Another trick is to sell items you may not deem as 'mothery material', or items of which need to go to make space for all the baby stuff, trade in for some staple maternity classics.

2- ASOS has a clearance section which can offer some neat bargains. Maternity or not!

3- Most vintage clothes have high waist/empire seams, great to wear above the bump, watch out with vintage sizing though, us ladies were a bit more petite those many moons ago!

4- Most 'maternity' items are not maternity specific, its mainly items sold as comfort wear, you see a lot of Waterfall cardigans for instance, with a massive mark up because they happen to have 'maternity' labelled onto them. The same is to be said of the high street maxi dress as the in trend maxi seems to be made of out jersey material, but the maternity ones are sold for a premium price.

5- Jersey! It's cropped up already, anything cottony and stretchy will probably be your lifesaver over the next few months, not those designer maternity jeans! (-speaking of which every pair I have purchased have caused me massive discomfort around the bottom of my bump when sat down... I despise the things!)

6 - American apparel, they are quite unique in that their ranges sell in both maternity and non maternity ranges. Their maternity section is a collection of products that accommodate to both. Try to bear this in mind when looking at the price tag, though as admittidly, the prices are a wee bit steep... I purchased a body-con pencil skirt at the start of my second trimseter, I have been wearing it through out my pregnancy without any hassle, because of the density and nature of the fabrics they use in the body-con items meant that my ever growing bump was always left supported, it has been my staple piece of clothing ever since I nabbed it. It supports me and looks great, I will rocking this skirt pre and post natal.

7- Speaking of investments, there are certain things on the market I would reccomend that may deem a bit pricey such as the above, but items do what they are supposed to. The Mama Spanx tights for instance offer great support aswell as lasting that bit longer than regular tights. I have tried other highstreet maternity tights and they just don't cut it, buying these to begin with may actually save you some pennies.

8- Most of your clothes can be revised to fit around your ever changing figure, there are lots of great guides online. DIY Maternity has a great range of projects suiting to advance to novice sewers!

9- The empire strikes back! Well no, not really, but one trick I love is typing in empire into eBay/wherever and finding empire seamed clothing which can be worn as maternity wear without the insane price tag

10- Many people forgo this item, diving in for nursing bras or larger bras, but a good maternity bra will save you from discomfort and not to mention potential stretchmarks. My boobs feel great!

Nesting (rant) / ode to boyfriend

I have a severe nesting urge, they seem to come on really late at night, stopping me from sleeping. Right now I am writing on the laptop researching furniture shops, rare tiles, how to do up my kitchen with the minimum of money, whilst my beloved gently snores the night away...

This is all rather silly as I don't even have my 'own kitchen' as of yet. For reasons I cant be bothered going into, me and my partner are still yet to move into our family house, this leaves me with a million things to do in preparation for the child but the catch is I can't do any of it at present. This leaves me feeling stressed out, unhappy, and very very guilty, also a bit of a chore to live with!
Because our current situation has left me unable to prosper with the physical side of nesting, I have been comforting myself nesting 'virtually'. This means spending a lot of time on websites, advice forums which soon gathers lists of new things to do, more things to think about, figuring out how the new house is going to be, restoring old frames, listing design ideas, buying second hand furniture, figuring out how we will make the new place (where-ever-it-will-bloody-be) our own, this makes me feel incredibly silly as we are yet to know what address we will be living at ...damn evolution!

Desperately do I want to assemble the cot, hang up the baby clothes and plug in the baby monitor, but it would all be quite futile (unless I were to be premature, eak).

Richard and I are still at our flat, surrounded by stuff we have accumulated for the house move and child, we are quickly running out of space... I am running out of time but yet, I just can't wait until this is all over!

I am quite big now, can never get comfortable, hurts to walk, hurts to stand, hurts to sit up, can't tie my own shoes, or get my own tights off and of course, I pee all the time. We were told the baby's head is engaged and has been for a couple of weeks now, wondering if deployment is coming sooner rather than later... Either way has pros and cons. - Thank god mother in law got us the moses basket just in case!

Websites I have been exploiting:

New York Home Design
saucy Dwellings (on LiveJournal)
eBay (natch)
Baby Gadget
Apartment Therapy
House to Home
Ikea room planner(s)
piewacketblog
Freecycle
ohdeedoh
Home (uktv)

Time bomb

Im in the lengthy process of buying a house, I am 34 weeks pregnant with the baby's head already engaged.

I am freaking out.

A thought provoking and candid account of one woman's experiences of childbirth, and the idea of being 'womanlike'

"When I told people I didn't plan to breast-feed my daughter (I only told people who asked; I'm old-fashioned that way), I met a fair amount of incredulity. "But don't you want to give your child every possible advantage?" I was asked. Not really, I replied. This kid will be born white and middle class in America; she's already ahead of 95% of the rest of the world. Why does she need every advantage?"

- http://mcsweeneys.net/links/bitchslap/bitchslap10.html

a twit...

Oh dear

This inventor seems to be more interested in showing off gadgets/silly ideas, rather than being excited over the kicking of the unborn... Or maybe I am just too cynical, I never really 'got' Twitter anyway...
I only find it entertaining to read what the famous kids are up to.
Also, if you care that much to have a text message every time your littleun kicks, get already poor long suffering partner to text you, don't make social networking websites even more tedious than necessary.

My baby kicks the most (and not to mention the hardest) at night. He could show Ian Curtis a thing or to, so perhaps I would get some satisfaction by the idea the baby's father was being woken up as many times as me. Hmmm, food for thought.
Ah, it wouldn't work, phones have a silent mode, I wish pregnancies came with adjustable settings!

Another thing, not to buy... The Kickbee fetal monitor!

Showing off: Children's artwork jewellery.

twochickstoo at Etsy has made this lovely way of capturing and not to mention showing off your little un's artwork.

You scan a copy over to her or send the orginal to her house after paying and by 10 days your kiddie's work will be forever cherished in one of these resin cameo pendants. Love it.

Getting my maternity kit off...

So, a friend of mine needed a preggo to bare (not really) all for his upcoming video installation. At first I didn't want to do it, but didn't want to let anyone down. I tried to re-write my parts where my chest would be covered with a newborn, un-surprisingly we had problems getting hold of one.

Looking back at the day I suppose I felt more funny about being partially naked in front of my friend, I also felt odd that by getting my kit off when pregnant would misrepresent my usual shape. The day came closer and closer then on the day I just took a deep breath whipped my top and bra off and got on with it. - the tension dropped and not after long I felt fine.

Looking back on the photographs (which I asked to be taken) I was slightly proud I had overcome being so wilful and just got on with it, not to mention I didn't appear to look like the Jabba-the-Hutt freak that I was convinced I would. Also, after the pregnancy, looking back at this time in years to come, I can see how I carried my first born. (Not to mention being a part of a pretty unique art-piece!). Just as well it is being exhibited in lands far away, I would probably feel much different if my friends were to see it!

I definitely suggest doing something similar, this has made me consider making a video of the birth or from the day of arrival so I can remember all of this, the negatives make me forget how happy I am to be carrying. Also, on speaking to other Mothers about this they recall the final stages/labour as cloudy, it seems to upset them that everyone sees their experience from a better view of which they did.

I don't know, maybe i'm going maaaaaaad.